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The daily routine was pretty simple: Wake up, layout, work, party. This one particular night was extremely interesting and it begins with a back-story
I was working at “the pink hotel†which just so happened to be the most expensive hotel on the boardwalk. Being the most outspoken front deskman, I made a lot of friends with the guests. It wasn’t easy having a girlfriend in the summertime at the beach either. However, I was dating this extremely odd girl that I describe as a tree-hugging hippie. Except that’s more like what she wanted to be. One afternoon an extremely popular guest came in, driving his 1975 Convertible caddy with his ex-wife and girlfriend. For the remainder of the story I will refer to this man as “Rich Bitch Dude.â€
He told me that he just wasn’t able to handle the both of them, and would like to get away. I told him where the best bars were to hit on some “chicksâ€, prices and so forth. This is when he offered to me a deal of a lifetime. Well a deal of a lifetime for any deskman at the local hotel. 

His offer: I meet him at the bar, party with him a bit and drive him home in his caddy. For this he would pay me $50.00.
The only complex part of this was how do I then get dropped off at this bar? But that was a simple task as I just had a good friend drop me off that evening around 11pm.
I remember walking in and finding him right away. He was so trashed it was disgusting! I loved it! When I first arrived I really didn’t want to stay long, and tried to get him to leave. After awhile I soon realized how easy this guy was to talk to despite being a doctor and decided I didn’t mind staying late. This man had a lot of intellect, and still knew how to party. After awhile of getting to know each other we decided to find some chicks to dance with and get completely trashed.
Of course both of us had girlfriends so we couldn’t do anything serious, and nothing is wrong with dancing anyways right? WRONG!
We found two beautiful mid 30’s women and began dancing with them. I found myself grinding this “Amazon of a woman†wearing army pants and a rock-star belt. She had an amazing body, but god damn was she huge! I mean like 6’-0 huge! I knew this woman could man handle me to no end, and some how it didn’t matter because I wasn’t planning on doing anything with her anyways.
An hour into the dance, she started to get extremely horny and was making mention of having a little fun after I dropped off “Rich Bitch dude.†I remember telling her, “I’m sorry, but I have a girlfriend and I don’t have a ride.†Basically anything a man could think of in order to get away with out being an ass about it.
This is when she pulled me into the dark closed off banquet room. She threw me down on one of the long tables and jumped on top of me. I had no clue what to do. WHAT IS A MAN TO DO? It was hot, I can’t lie, but it was. I was being raped by this woman, and had pretty much no choice. I was even fighting it as she was saying. “You don’t dance like that with someone unless you want to fuck them!†She ravaged my body for about 15 minutes before I found a way to get away. I promised her to call her after I dropped off “Rich Bitch dude†and come fuck her eyeballs out.
I worked my way back to the front, finding my new friend “Rich Bitch Dude,†and I told him. “YO, we have got to go! Now!â€
He definitely wasn’t ready to leave, so I had to explain him the circumstances. As we were heading out to the door, my dad came up to me and asked, “Hey, where you going?†Oh if I didn’t tell you earlier, my father parties A LOT! My response was pretty simple “Dad, this chick is trying to rape me, can you please hit on her and keep her away long enough for me to drive away.†At this point I was outside, and near the car.
My “Rich Bitch dude†had the greatest parking spot in the house, probably from a $100 dollar tip to the bouncer and he was already in the car. I got in pulled out and waived goodbye to the woman I will always remember as the Amazon Army Bitch.
I then drove my “Rich bitch dude†back to the hotel, received my $100 dollars instead of the $50. I said my goodnight and went to my soon to be ex’s.
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I think this story is freakin’ hilarious. Just the fact that your met your Dad at some random bar is hilarious in its own regard.
I agree. And the fact that you thought you could pass this girl off to your dad, LOL. But to be perfectly honest, I am kinda having my doubts about some 6’0″ “woman”. I mean, are you sure? You may have been a little bit more trashed than you thought you were….
Gotta love Alcohol mixed with a little poor judgement..
omg. the front door guy!