Letters to the Girls I (Once) Love(d): 11

There was a letter written to someone, somewhere, once. It may have read, in part:

“Dear [REDACTED 11],

I’m sorry I have to write you this way. I’m not trying to be a coward, or show disrespect to our relationship, but this is the only way I can clearly say what I need to say. If I try to say it to you in person I’ll be reduced to whimpering and crying, and nothing will be said. At least this way I can bring you into my thoughts while whimpering and crying. Consider this me multitasking.

I’ve never loved someone like I love you. The thought of not having you by my side until the second I die doesn’t just break my heart, it doesn’t only make me sick to my stomach, it burns my eyes, it tightens every muscle in my body, it forces my brain and my heart to beat against their cages to be released so they can run into the woods and die honorably, alone. But I’ve realized that perhaps we can’t be together. We’re not destined for each other. Not that I believe in destiny, anyway.

The problem we face is insurmountable. I can never complete you, because in order for me to complete you I’d have to lie to you. I’ll never believe in God. I’m not built for that. In order to have the life you’ve always imagined yourself having, you need someone that shares those beliefs with you. In a lot of ways, that’s the most important thing you look for in the person you’re going to spend the rest of your life with. I’m not him. I can’t be him. And there’s no possible way I can ever communicate how much I regret that. Because I love you with every piece of me. I really, really do.

We can’t change for one another. It’s not in us. It wouldn’t be fair to either of us. And to ignore the problem would cause it to fester. I can give you the world and it wouldn’t be enough. Please don’t take that as a bad thing. I’m not placing blame, I’m trying to speak truth. Regardless of what I can give you in the life we build, I can never return your faith. I can never sit in church with you on Sunday and not be lying. Because of this, even if I’m holding you and kissing you and telling you how much I love you, and what an amazing life I’ve had because of you, while you lie on your deathbed you’ll know that you’re going to die alone. I won’t be joining you in eternity. That’s always going to be in the back of your mind. The mortal life is enough for me. I’m not built for heaven. You are.

I don’t think that’s fair. It’s not fair to you to only ever be 90% complete. And it’s not fair for me to be constantly competing with God. It’s not a fight I can win. It’s not a fight I want to win. I guess this is me forfeiting, then.

It will always be in my imagination the life we could have led together if only there was room for compromise. How beautiful we would be together. How inspiring our story would be. How wasteful our differences are.

Goodbye, darling. I hope we can both find what we’ve had again. I have no choice but to believe we will.”

And someone, somewhere, never read that letter.

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Our First Time With A Knife (Part Four)

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Darkest Hour

I turned and faced my darknest hour. The man lifted his hat, showing me a shocking face. “Son, what have you done! You’ve killed souls and left heartless trails behind you!” I croaked, holding my bleeding chest. He laughed, throwing the cap to the solid concrete ground. He brought out his cane and stricked me. Blue energy shot out from the tip, giving me hell. I cried out, echo screams corroded the corridors. The painfull simmer of my voice slowly died out. The soul crushing killed brought out his knife, telling me his harsh stories of his past. I looked down, my knees loosing the strength. I collapsed, my knuckles turning pale white in the distant moonlight. I whispered the unforgettable words of the memorable future. My arms became stiff, my eyes became sore, my heart became cold. I felt the ‘never ending’ heartbeat stop. My chest burned as the fire swallowed my body.

He left me, not bothered to show any sorrow. There I died, never to be rested…

I had come to realise the full truth of the young boy I had once raised. Running with no top down the stairs, holding a cardboard sword. Hanging with a strip of , he ripped up his masterpiece and screamed for

Thriller in the scary night

Thriller in the scary night

Lucy knew she should have not walked in the scary alley. She could not help it. She had finished a very long day at work in the cafeteria and she was not thinking straight.

The narrow alley was filthy with rubbish, dead rats and decomposed food.

The place stank so badly Lucy fell nauseous.

The police had reported on many occasions a lot of women had disappeared in the last few years. Someone suggested the abductor was hiding somewhere ready to strike again making the alley very unsafe.

All these women would eventually reappear naked and dead with cuts and bruises on their bodies. The police found they were sexually assaulted before being fatally stabbed with a long knife.

Lucy felt very uncomfortable walking through the alley. She wanted to go through as quickly as possible. The alley was between old damage factories, which had not been used for years. So even if she was in danger and shouting for help no one would ever come to rescue her.

The alley was very long and there was no way to escape so she had to walk to the other side.

She heard a noise behind her. A light footstep was in the distance. She stopped. The noise stopped as well. She began to walk again and the footsteps were much louder. She started to walk more quickly but the mysterious stranger increased the speed to keep up.

Lucy looked back and said, “Who is there?”

No one replied.

Lucy started to cry and get agitated. She was so frightened. She glanced back and saw a shadow on the wall.

Her walk became a run but the mysterious stranger did not give up the chase and he began to run faster and faster.

Lucy could feel her heart beating in her chest. Her breath became heavier. She knew she could not hide anywhere or turn anywhere to escape from the mysterious stranger. She felt she was like an animal in a cage.

She glanced back for the third time and now the shadow was bigger. She could see the shadow was holding something in its right hand. She could not make out what it was. She assumed it was a knife. The metallic blade vibrated in the air making Lucy tremble violently.

The mysterious stranger was gaining on Lucy. She felt her chances to survival were becoming slimmer and slimmer. The mysterious stranger was almost behind her ready to strike.

Lucy saw the exit of the alley in front of her. Her eyes filled with joy. With her last attempt to survive she pushed her tired legs to the extreme.

Lucy collided against a body in front of her. She was lying on the floor. Thinking the mysterious stranger had managed to be in front of her, she began to crawl backwards from him.

“ Are you ok, madam?” the policeman said with a warm smile.

“I’m fine, thanks” Lucy replied with a relieved smile after catching her breath.

“Please take my hand, I will help you to stand up”

She was so happy to see a policeman in this area. She felt so safe now. She gave her hand and the policeman helped her.

“Have you walked down the alley?”

“Yes, I did”

“Did you know it is dangerous?”

“Yes, I heard. It was my mistake. I realised I was in the alley half way. Have you seen anyone coming out from the alley except me?”

“No madam, why did you?”

“I thought someone was chasing me with a knife”

“I can assure you no one came out from the alley except you. Tonight, I am patrolling this area to make it safe”

“I feel safe now thanks for being here”

“It is my duties, madam. I hope you have a safe journey”

“Thanks officer”

Lucy felt better even though she escaped from the danger. She felt not completely comfortable. There was a weird feeling the mysterious stranger could have followed her. She was walking in the main square where a lot of people were still out. She tried to look at their shadow to see if she could recognise the one, who had chased her earlier, but they were absolutely different. Even she tried to smell the air or hear the footsteps. None of them matched her memory.

There was not a trace of the mysterious stranger, Lucy was still very careful walking in the main street and taking the bus to go home.

She did not want to be off her guard. She was staring at anyone she could see and the people looked at her in surprise.

She was feeling more confident of herself after she recognised her street. She began to have more strength and she knew no one could harm her now. Her husband was home to protect her. No one would dare to enter her house and violate her.

She sighed with a sense of relief.

She walked out of the bus and walked for a brief moment. The street was very quiet. No one was walking except her. She smiled. She put the key in the front door and turned it. She opened it and closed behind her.

She put her head against the cold doorframe. She was so pleased to be home. She was not longer in danger. She was safe now turning the key.

Lucy was wrong about being safe. Someone was bashing the doorframe violently. She put her hand in front of her mouth in terror. The maniac pulled up the letterbox and let the knife inside. The knife was looking for her. It only found the letterbox and not being satisfied attacked the doorframe.

Lucy shouted ”Help, Steve”. Her voice echoed in the empty house. She forgot. Steve was on holiday and he would not be back until the following day. She was alone and frightened like a child.

A neighbour’s dog was barking awakened by the noise.

Lucy ran on the bare wood stairs but slipped injuring her knee.  The maniac left the front door and smashed the back door. Lucy was trying to crawl forward with difficulties. Her knee was badly injured. She looked at the maniac. “I know you”

That were the last words she said. The maniac stabbed her several times leaving her body lifeless and in a pool of blood. He started to cut her beautiful red dress. He sexually touched her warm body. In his sick state of mind he was enjoying himself.

Then he stopped. He heard the police sirens. There were a lot of people surrounding the house. He stood up rooted to the floor knowing there was no escape.

Two officers entered the house from the back door and jumped on the maniac disarming and handcuffing him.

“Inspector, it is all clear”

“Well done officers! We have captured the maniac who has frightened the city for so long”

“You! I cannot believe it’s you! You are the best officer in the force. You have arrested so many criminals and the public love you”

“Why, Constable George Brown, have you killed all these women?” the inspector looked with eyes so intense they seemed to take fire.

“I don’t know sir. I have this animal instinct in me. I do not know what I was doing”

“Take him away. Away from me”

The two officers took George Brown to the police car.

“Why would such a great officer do this? Look at this beautiful woman. She doesn’t deserve to die” looking at her with eyes full of tears covering her cold body with a blanket.

Megan and Sarah 2

 

I woke up around 10am anyway. I knew that I would need at least an hour to become human again and another to clean my self up. Caffeine! I made my way upstairs and into the kitchen. My mom was already sitting at the table drinking her coffee. I grabbed my Dew from the fridge and turned to head back down to my room to complete the transformation from zombie.  Mom normally doesn’t bother me until I come back up but this morning she felt like talking. GRR ARRG!!! “Morning Sweetie. Are you alive yet? Can we talk?”

“What are the chances that you’ll pretend that you haven’t seen me yet?”

“Slim to none. Come on It’s nothing bad. Sit down next to mamma.” She patted the seat on the chair next to her like I was five all over again. GRRR double ARRGH. I walked over and sat down in the chair. I popped the tab on my Dew and took a big swig. “Taylor called me when she got home last night.” My eyes bugged out of my head and I nearly spit all over the place. She wouldn’t have, would she? I pulled myself together. “Sorry, went down the wrong pipe. You were saying?”

“Well, what are your plans for the day?”

“Nothing really, why?”

“Taylor wants to take us out to a late lunch today. She said that there was a surprise and that she wouldn’t take no for an answer.”

“Do you have any idea what she’s got up her sleeve?” Mom shook her head no very as a matter of factly. “I swear I have no idea what she’s up to. Are you up for it?”

I thought about it for a second and agreed to come along. “Oh crap! What time do we have to meet her or whatever?” She looked at me kind of strangely and said around Two o’clock and asked why. That was a relief. I really wanted to make sure that Sarah got her stuff back. I told her about yesterday and that Sarah would be here around noon.

“Oh, that’s funny. I wish I’d been there to see that.” She let out a small laugh but her face became all serious again. Oh great here it comes.

“She also told me about your little chat in the kitchen.” I started to speak but she put her hands up to stop me. “She didn’t tell what you talked about or anything. She just told me to leave you the hell alone and stop pestering you about things.” I knew she wouldn’t rat me out!

“Did she actually say that or are you exaggerating?” She smiled at me and I knew that Taylor wouldn’t talk to my mother like that. “So, I’m taking her advice. Whenever, you are ready to tell me anything, I’ll be here. Until then, I’m off your back. I remember how hard it was for me at 17. You don’t need me breathing down your neck.”

I practically flew out of my chair to give her a hug. She hugged me back. When we pulled apart we gave each other a nod of understanding. “Now, I’m going to go away now. Be ready by 1:45pm. Taylor will be here around 2.” She got up and made her way upstairs. I retreated back to my cave, feeling so much better today then I did yesterday. A lot better actually.

About an hour and half later I was ready. Since I technically didn’t have to be ready, ready for another 2 hours, I slipped on some shorts and a tee shirt, plopped on my couch and waited for Sarah to get here. I didn’t have to wait long. Only a few minutes had passed when I heard her mustang pulling into the driveway.

I answered the door before she could ring the bell. “Hey, you found it.”

“Sure did. You were right that was easy. Sorry I’m a little early. I gave myself plenty of time incase I got lost.”

“No worries. C’mon in.” Once we were inside, my mom came down stairs and greeted us. “Hey mom, this is Sarah the girl I told you about earlier.”

“Well hello Sarah. I’m Carly. It’s nice to meet you.” She said as she extended her hand. “Hi, nice to meet you as well.” Sarah said as she shook her hand. “So, I hear you’re new in town. How do you like it here so far?”

“Well to be honest, I don’t know yet. Other than, literally running into your daughter, I haven’t had much of a chance to settle in. But I’ve got a feeling I’m going to like it here.” She smiled at me when saying it and her cheeks flashed a hint of red. My mom laughed. “Yeah, Megan told me how you girls met, earlier. Wished I could’ve been there to see that.”

“God, it was so embarrassing! Thankfully, it was Megan and not someone else. Otherwise, I think my first day of school would be unbearable.”

“And what makes you think I won’t tell everyone I know, what a klutz the new girl is.” I said it teasingly but a look of dread crossed her face. “I’m kidding. I wouldn’t do something like that. That’s just mean.” She relaxed, realizing that I really was just kidding.

“Well girls, I got to run. Sarah it was really nice meeting you. Come around again soon ok.”

“Looking forward to it.”

“Megan, I’m just running up to the store. I’ll be back in a little while. Do you need anything?”

“No, I’m good. See you in a bit.” With that she was gone. I turned to look at Sarah and saw her glancing about the house.  “Your house is deceiving from the outside. This thing is huge!”

“Yeah we get that a lot. Let me give you the five cent tour.” We bounced from room to room. She took everything in but still couldn’t get over how much space we had compared to the outside view. I ended the tour with my room. “You’re kidding me, right? Your room looks like an apartment!”

“Nope, it was a birthday present when I turned 16. My mom said that I deserved my own space just as much as she did. She gave me this space and turned my old room into a hobby room.”

“Your mom rocks! This is awesome.”  She passed by me continuing to look around. What did you do to deserve your “own space”?

“Well, I don’t think I deserved it. Actually, I think she got tired of all my friends staying over. We would take over the living room almost every weekend and sometimes during the week. Especially when it was softball season. I think she was the one who wanted space.” We both laughed as I invited her to have a seat. “So you play softball, have tons of friends and you’re a good Samaritan? Wow did I find the right girl to knock over.” She laughed at her own comments but saw that I only half smiled. Truth is I didn’t really have a lot of friends anymore. I still played softball, but after an injury two years ago, I lost my confidence and well, let’s just say I went from Hero to Zero pretty quick. “I don’t play for school anymore; just rec ball and well the only friends that I still have is Alex. She’s the one that was bent over laughing at me yesterday.”

“Oh yeah, how bad did she make fun of you after I left?”

“I only had to smack her twice before she gave it up.” I lied. Alex hadn’t made fun of me about that at all because well she teased me about flirting with Sarah. Who is now sitting on my couch.

( Finish conversation/ talk about Sarah and where she came from)

I didn’t realize that we had been talking for like two hours. She was so easy to talk to. It was like we’d been friends for years. It felt easy and natural to be around her. I was actually comfortable, something that normally takes a long time to happen when I meet someone new. We’d clicked and I hope it just wasn’t one sided. I’d like to get to know her more and possibly expand my non-existent social life. There was only one problem that I found. I was attracted to this girl and I have no idea what to do about it. I mean seriously, what do I do? Tell her? Hell, I just met her. She’s new in town and all she’s probably trying to do is make a new friend. Pathetic loser! That’s what I am. I might be in trouble here.

I heard foot steps coming from the stairs that led to my room. I glanced at the clock. It finally registered that I was supposed to be ready by now. Oh crap! “Hey kiddo, are you ready?” Taylor was in the doorway before I could answer. “Oh, I’m sorry Megan. I didn’t know you had company.”

“No worries, Taylor. This is Sarah. She’s the one whose stuff I found. I told you about it yesterday.”  Sarah stepped forward and extended her hand to Taylor. Taylor stepped into the room and accepted it with a smile. “You’re lucky Megan was the one who found your stuff. Most people around here wouldn’t have bothered. She’s a sweetie like that.” She gave me a little wink.

“ I’m beginning to see that.” I felt my face redden at the cute compliment, but turned away, hoping that she didn’t see me blush. Taylor on the other hand doesn’t miss a thing. She just smiled at me and let it go. “Taylor, I’ll be ready in a few minutes. I’m sorry, we got to talking and I completely lost track of time.” Sarah looked around the room and found the clock. I’m guessing from the expression on her face that she couldn’t believe it either. “I’m sorry I took up so much of your time today and now I’ve made you late for something. I should get going.” She gathered up her bag. Before I could think, I blurted out . “Would you like to come with us Sarah?“ Taylor looked at me kind of surprised but with approval at the same time.

“Oh, I’ve already taken up so much of your time Megan. I don’t want to take up anymore.”

“Hey, it’s my time and I choose to do with it what I want. So, are you hungry?”

“Actually, yes I’m starving. I didn’t have breakfast.”

“Well that settles it then.” Taylor finally stated.  She gave me that surprised but approving  look again. “I’ll wait upstairs with Carly. See you girls in a few minutes. Taylor went back upstairs like she had said. I went over to my dresser and pulled out the outfit I had picked out earlier and headed for the bathroom. “I won’t be but a minute and then we can get out of here.” She looked down at the clothes I had picked out then looked at her own outfit. “Am I dressed ok, I see you’re putting on nicer clothes.” I looked her over and my damn mouth started moving before my brain told it what it should say. “You look amazing.” Oh God, Sometimes I shouldn’t say words at all. Stupid, Stupid slow ass brain! I felt the heat rise in my cheeks. I couldn’t bring myself to meet her eyes. “I mean- I-I meant to say, you’re fine the way you are b-but you could change into you’re new jeans, if that would make you feel better.”

“It would, could I use your bathroom to change?”  A slight smile replaced the look of uncertainty she had just a moment ago.

“Yeah, sure. Right through here.” I held open the door for her as she started inside. She stopped before she made it in all the way. She gave me another little smile and those bright green eyes met mine. “Thank you.” She said in a soft voice and from the look she gave, I don’t think she meant me letting her use the bathroom to change.  Did she?

Hidden Prologue

OK so I know I do a lot of poetry but this is something a little different. I will do my best to post the next chapter every day but no promises. This is the prologue to a story I’ve been working on.

“Come on, Vanessa, he’s your best friend, just talk to him,” Jenny said grabbing my arm.

“No, you’re my best friend and besides he’s with his girlfriend,” I stated matter-of-factly,  pulling my arm back.

“Girlfriend or no girlfriend, Mitchel still has feelings for you and you definitely need to tell him how you feel.” She started pulling me towards the spot where Mitchel was standing with the girl he proclaimed to love. I pulled back. I couldn’t even look his way. I was too scared to talk to him. Kevin walked out of the side door of the school. Thanking God, I wiggled away from Jenny and ran in his direction.

“Kevin, you are such a lifesaver.” I hugged him and started to head towards home.

“Oh, no you don’t,” Jenny said catching my arm. “Now, Kevin, help me out here. Don’t you agree that Vanessa should tell Mitchel that she still likes him?”

“Yup.” Kevin grabbed my other arm and they both pulled me over to Mitchel and Ashley.

“Hey, Mitchel, can we talk to you real quick?” Kevin asked. Mitchel nodded, kissed Ashley and walked over. He looked puzzled as he looked at the scene before him. Kevin and Jenny were holding me as I desperately tried to free myself from their steady grips.

“What’s up?” Mitchel asked concerned about what was happening to his best friend. I had known Mitchel almost all my life but I couldn’t bring myself to speak to him now. I did my best to avoid the deep emeralds that rested themselves in the sockets where his eyes should be. I was still struggling to release myself from Kevin and Jenny but with little success.

“Vanessa?” Mitchel’s confusion danced across his face toying with amusement. I started to pull away harder as the tears began to form and spill over my lashes.

“Please just let me go, this isn’t funny anymore,” I said, trembling from the effort.

“Are you ok?” Mitchel said, reaching out to wipe the tears that had started to run down the side of my face. I nodded and finally succeeded in pulling away from Kevin and Jenny and ran.

I left Mitchell standing there confused and hurt at my shying away and not telling him everything. I finally had to stop about a hundred feet away from where I had left them. I was safely tucked around the side of the building when I finally let the rest of my emotions take hold of me. I fell to the ground crying and holding the necklace Mitchel didn’t know I still wore. He gave it to me for my birthday a few years ago and I had never taken it off. The small dolphin gave me comfort even on the worst of days. The same way he used to. I heard footsteps stop behind me as I finished the last of my tears and stood to leave.

“Look, Kevin, the fact is he loves Ashley, not me. It doesn’t matter whether or not he knows how I feel about him. It’s over. Just let it drop. I can’t do this anymore.” I turned to face Mitchel. He was clearly taken aback by what I had just uttered to who I thought was Kevin.

“V-Vanessa?” he stuttered out taking a few steps towards me. Tears were now streaming down my face again in a fresh river. He closed the small distance between us in an easy stride and gathered me into his arms.

“Vanessa, I had no idea,” He said, planting kisses in my damp hair. He sounded so hurt and so shocked that I pulled away to tell him not to worry about me, but before I could speak, he kissed me.

ok I know its really rough but please let me know what you think!

Welcome Writers

Please come and add your stories to the site!  We would like to hear your true stories, or just some wonderful pieces of literature.  I would like to hear Poems, True Stories, Fiction, Non-Fiction, Comedy, Drama, Love, Romance.

Please take part in this experience, as I want you to have a place you can vent your true colors.

Write stories online

Hey everyone!  Another Site News update!

If you wanna write a story or submit a story, the best way to do it right now is to follow the directions on the submit a story page.  However,

I have decided to begin working on the: Author pages, and plan to make changes to it in our near future.  Hopefully giving everyone a cool little page they can call their own! Continue reading →

I Fucking Quit!

For years all I would ever do, is go to the diner. The diner was the best place at night, a place you can go and just get away, relax. One particular evening, me and my boy MCizzle, decided to go to our favorite diner. The diner was our favorite because we knew all the people that worked there. We would get free food and soda, almost every night we went.

You already know the story we go to diners when we fail at picking up girls earlier that evening. Continue reading →

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The Man That Wanted Me Dead! (The Alternate Ending)

My co-workers didnt like him much either. Have you ever met a person, that follows you around making sure you didnt mess anything up? You know, the kinda person that litteraly re-does everything you just did, like your an idiot? Thats one of Daves favorite things to do. He really had the whole office hating him. Lets just say, we would all hope he would call off.. and never return!… Yeah We wished that to happen! Continue reading →

The Man That Wanted Me Dead! (part 2)

Dave was kicked out of the Marines, for reasons unknown. He took plenty of medication a day to keep himself normal. He has no friends, and spends most of his time online. He was extremely by the book; don’t mess anything up! The kind of man that spends 30 dollars on a pen, and if you use it, he would have to go wash it off in the sink, like you’rediseased! Dont be surprised if he reads this, He is ready to kill any of his enemies! Continue reading →